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Broken Windows and Hearts

Relationships fail. They fail for many different reasons: incompatibility, infidelity or sometimes because the quality of someone’s life becomes compromised by the unhealthy behavior of their partner. The quality of a person’s life defines them -- their health, their ability to care for themselves and their ability to grow personally and professionally.In the winter of 2000, then New York City Mayor Rudolph Giuliani cited the ‘Broken Windows’ theory. The theory set forth the belief that when small unhealthy behaviors are ignored, they often lead to greater ones. In other words, if a neighborhood has a broken window and it is left broken, more will follow. The same theory can be applied to relationships. If unhealthy behaviors such as hurtful observations, criticism, intimidation and threats of violence are ignored they often become an accepted part of the relationship. A window breaks when you are ridiculed, accused of something you didn’t do, or called to once again face past mistakes. If you don’t fix the first window, the quality of your life will resemble those neighborhoods that couldn’t be repaired because of too many broken windows.

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